Thursday, August 22, 2013

What Drives Us?

What drives us to do the things we like to do?

Lately, I have been reading posts from Ronibats.PH and say what, I didn't expect that I could relate to his experiences or feelings, since he is a medical doctor and I've never wanted anything related to medicine because I hate Physics, Biology and Chemistry. In short, I hate natural sciences. =)) Although I do like applied sciences; remember that I study Math and Computer Science most of the time.

Being a previous intern and now a resident in Philippine General Hospital, he is constantly exposed to thousands of Filipinos suffering from poverty, deprivation of health care privileges from the government, and of course, various illnesses -- both terminal and curable. Not to mention the numerous deaths he had already witnessed, with loved ones grieving beside the hospital beds. I am aware and have also seen these things during the times I have taken care of family, friends and relatives admitted to PGH; whether it be at the pay wards or the charity wards. But no, we are not very similar in terms of exposure to this events. I related to him the most in his views on dreaming, but sadly, I chose the different path.

Everyone, sometimes including himself, were always asking him the question, "Bakit ka magme-med? Dapat mag-*insert Math-related course here* ka na lang." [Why are you taking up medicine? You should just take *insert Math-related course here*.] The same thing happened to me just before I entered college. "Ba't gusto mo mag-photography, eh hobby lang naman 'yun? Mag-4 year course ka na lang muna ta's saka mo i-take 'yun kung gusto mo talaga." [Why do you want photography when it's just a hobby? Just take up a four-year course first then proceed with it if you really want it.]

That is where I differed from Sir Ron. I didn't have enough courage to write UP Diliman as my first choice campus and BA Film as my first choice course when my mother commented, "Why are you writing UP Diliman when you're just a street away from UP Manila?" I just obeyed what my parents wanted. Now that my sister's currently studying at UPD because Education courses are not offered here in Manila, I'm starting to wonder if I had committed the wrong decision of not pursuing what I really wanted.

Not that I regret entering UPM.

I have met my wonderful blockmates (including the adopted shiftees and transferees), my FBCP family, my children and grandchildren in ComSci, my professors (both the nice and terror ones), and other people in UPM that have become part of me -- and that part of me would be different if ever I didn't study there.

Alone times are thinking time for me. Where did I go wrong? What did I do wrong? were questions that often enter my mind during those times. And after reading Sir Ron's post, I guess I already found answers for these not very uncommon questions in life. :)

Why do I like photography?

Simple. I just like it.

The answer to the question, "Why do you like _____?" should be really simple. We have our own reasons, although I cannot say altogether that every reason is right (that is where I disagree with Sir Ron), the problem is uncertainty and lack of determination for what we really want. It's the reason why some people cry, some people quit, and some people lose their minds.

We tend to forget that we like something just because we like it. All the other reasons just fall behind this one.

I am guilty of forgetting this.

And to quote Mr. Ronnie Baticulon from his blog:
Ang problema ay nag-uugat sa kawalan ng kasiguraduhan. Kaya may umiiyak. Kaya may nagku-quit. Kaya may nasisiraan ng bait. Dahil sa buhay, ang pinakamatinong sagot ay ang pinakasimple. Madalas nga, sa sobrang simple e tatanungin mo ang iyong sarili, “Kailangan pa ba ng dahilan?”

Let me ask my first question again:

What drives us to do the things we like to do?

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